Thursday, October 29, 2009
The Danger of Celebrating Halloween - 2
from Charisma Magazine
Halloween is much more than a holiday filled with fun and tricks or treats. It is a time for the gathering of evil that masquerades behind the fictitious characters of Dracula, werewolves, mummies and witches on brooms. The truth is that these demons that have been presented as scary cartoons actually exist. I have prayed for witches who are addicted to drinking blood and howling at the moon.
While the lukewarm and ignorant think of these customs as "just harmless fun," the vortexes of hell are releasing new assignments against souls. Witches take pride in laughing at the ignorance of natural men (those who ignore the spirit realm).
Decorating buildings with Halloween scenes, dressing up for parties, going door-to-door for candy, standing around bonfires and highlighting pumpkin patches are all acts rooted in entertaining familiar spirits. All these activities are demonic and have occult roots.
The word "occult" means "secret." The danger of Halloween is not in the scary things we see but in the secret, wicked, cruel activities that go on behind the scenes. These activities include:
* Sex with demons
* Orgies between animals and humans
* Animal and human sacrifices
* Sacrificing babies to shed innocent blood
* Rape and molestation of adults, children and babies
* Revel nights
* Conjuring of demons and casting of spells
* Release of "time-released" curses against the innocent and the ignorant.
Another abomination that goes on behind the scenes of Halloween is necromancy, or communication with the dead. Séances and contacting spirit guides are very popular on Halloween, so there is a lot of darkness lurking in the air.
However, Ephesians 1:19-21 speaks of the authority of the believer and the exceeding greatness of God's power in us (the same power that raised Christ from the dead). It goes on to say that that Jesus is seated in heavenly places far above all principalities, power, might, dominions and every name that is named. The good news is that because we are seated in heavenly places with Jesus, the same demonic activity that is under His feet is under our feet, too!
People who worship the devil continue to attempt to lift him up. But he has already been cast out and down! Many are blinded to this fact, but the day will come when all will know he has been defeated once and for all.
When we accept Jesus but refuse to renounce Satan and his practices, we are neither hot nor cold but lukewarm—and the Word says that God will spit us out of His mouth. The problem with lukewarm is that it attempts to mix the things of the devil with the things of God. It is God's desire that we serve Him alone.
Second Corinthians 6:15 asks the question, "And what agreement has Christ with Belial?" As believers, we need to answer that question in our hearts. We must avoid the very appearance of evil. I would not want a demon spirit to mistake me for an occult worshiper.
There is no doubt in my heart that God is not calling us to replace fall festivals and Halloween activities; rather, He wants us to utterly destroy the deeds of this season. If you or your family members have opened the door to any curses that are released during the demonic fall festivals, renounce them and repent. I already have. Then declare with me: "As for me and my house, we will serve the Lord!"
About the author: Kimberly Daniels is a sought-after conference speaker and preacher. She is the founder of Kimberly Daniels Ministries International (kimberlydaniels.com), Spoken Word Ministries—the church she pastors in Jacksonville, Florida, with her husband, Ardell—A Child of the King Learning Center and Word Bible College. Kim is a recognized prophetic voice as well as the author of several books, including her most recent, Prayers that Bring Change (Charisma House).
Halloween is much more than a holiday filled with fun and tricks or treats. It is a time for the gathering of evil that masquerades behind the fictitious characters of Dracula, werewolves, mummies and witches on brooms. The truth is that these demons that have been presented as scary cartoons actually exist. I have prayed for witches who are addicted to drinking blood and howling at the moon.
While the lukewarm and ignorant think of these customs as "just harmless fun," the vortexes of hell are releasing new assignments against souls. Witches take pride in laughing at the ignorance of natural men (those who ignore the spirit realm).
Decorating buildings with Halloween scenes, dressing up for parties, going door-to-door for candy, standing around bonfires and highlighting pumpkin patches are all acts rooted in entertaining familiar spirits. All these activities are demonic and have occult roots.
The word "occult" means "secret." The danger of Halloween is not in the scary things we see but in the secret, wicked, cruel activities that go on behind the scenes. These activities include:
* Sex with demons
* Orgies between animals and humans
* Animal and human sacrifices
* Sacrificing babies to shed innocent blood
* Rape and molestation of adults, children and babies
* Revel nights
* Conjuring of demons and casting of spells
* Release of "time-released" curses against the innocent and the ignorant.
Another abomination that goes on behind the scenes of Halloween is necromancy, or communication with the dead. Séances and contacting spirit guides are very popular on Halloween, so there is a lot of darkness lurking in the air.
However, Ephesians 1:19-21 speaks of the authority of the believer and the exceeding greatness of God's power in us (the same power that raised Christ from the dead). It goes on to say that that Jesus is seated in heavenly places far above all principalities, power, might, dominions and every name that is named. The good news is that because we are seated in heavenly places with Jesus, the same demonic activity that is under His feet is under our feet, too!
People who worship the devil continue to attempt to lift him up. But he has already been cast out and down! Many are blinded to this fact, but the day will come when all will know he has been defeated once and for all.
When we accept Jesus but refuse to renounce Satan and his practices, we are neither hot nor cold but lukewarm—and the Word says that God will spit us out of His mouth. The problem with lukewarm is that it attempts to mix the things of the devil with the things of God. It is God's desire that we serve Him alone.
Second Corinthians 6:15 asks the question, "And what agreement has Christ with Belial?" As believers, we need to answer that question in our hearts. We must avoid the very appearance of evil. I would not want a demon spirit to mistake me for an occult worshiper.
There is no doubt in my heart that God is not calling us to replace fall festivals and Halloween activities; rather, He wants us to utterly destroy the deeds of this season. If you or your family members have opened the door to any curses that are released during the demonic fall festivals, renounce them and repent. I already have. Then declare with me: "As for me and my house, we will serve the Lord!"
About the author: Kimberly Daniels is a sought-after conference speaker and preacher. She is the founder of Kimberly Daniels Ministries International (kimberlydaniels.com), Spoken Word Ministries—the church she pastors in Jacksonville, Florida, with her husband, Ardell—A Child of the King Learning Center and Word Bible College. Kim is a recognized prophetic voice as well as the author of several books, including her most recent, Prayers that Bring Change (Charisma House).
Wednesday, October 28, 2009
The Danger of Celebrating Halloween - 1
from Charisma Magazine
Halloween—October 31—is considered a holiday in the United States. In fact, it rivals Christmas with regard to how widely celebrated it is. Stores that sell only Halloween-related paraphernalia open up a few months before the day and close shortly after it ends. But is Halloween a holiday that Christians should be observing?
The word "holiday" means "holy day." But there is nothing holy about Halloween. The root word of Halloween is "hallow," which means "holy, consecrated and set apart for service." If this holiday is hallowed, whose service is it set apart for? The answer to that question is very easy—Lucifer's!
Lucifer is a part of the demonic godhead. Remember, everything God has, the devil has a counterfeit. Halloween is a counterfeit holy day that is dedicated to celebrating the demonic trinity of : the Luciferian Spirit (the false father); the Antichrist Spirit (the false holy spirit); and the Spirit of Belial (the false son).
The key word in discussing Halloween is "dedicated." It is dedicated to darkness and is an accursed season. During Halloween, time-released curses are always loosed. A time-released curse is a period that has been set aside to release demonic activity and to ensnare souls in great measure.
You may ask, "Doesn't God have more power than the devil?" Yes, but He has given that power to us. If we do not walk in it, we will become the devil's prey. Witchcraft works through dirty hearts and wrong spirits.
During this period demons are assigned against those who participate in the rituals and festivities. These demons are automatically drawn to the fetishes that open doors for them to come into the lives of human beings. For example, most of the candy sold during this season has been dedicated and prayed over by witches.
I do not buy candy during the Halloween season. Curses are sent through the tricks and treats of the innocent whether they get it by going door to door or by purchasing it from the local grocery store. The demons cannot tell the difference.
Even the colors of Halloween (orange, brown and dark red) are dedicated. These colors are connected to the fall equinox, which is around the 20th or 21st of September each year and is sometimes called "Mabon." During this season witches are celebrating the changing of the seasons from summer to fall. They give praise to the gods for the demonic harvest. They pray to the gods of the elements (air, fire, water and earth).
Mother earth is highly celebrated during the fall demonic harvest. Witches praise mother earth by bringing her fruits, nuts and herbs. Demons are loosed during these acts of worship. When nice church folk lay out their pumpkins on the church lawn, fill their baskets with nuts and herbs, and fire up their bonfires, the demons get busy. They have no respect for the church grounds. They respect only the sacrifice and do not care if it comes from believers or non-believers.
Gathering around bonfires is a common practice in pagan worship. As I remember, the bonfires that I attended during homecoming week when I was in high school were always in the fall. I am amazed at how we ignorantly participate in pagan, occult rituals.
The gods of harvest that the witches worship during their fall festivals are the Corn King and the Harvest Lord. The devil is too stupid to understand that Jesus is the Lord of the Harvest 365 days a year. But we cannot be ignorant of the devices of the enemy. When we pray, we bind the powers of the strong men that people involved in the occult worship.
Halloween—October 31—is considered a holiday in the United States. In fact, it rivals Christmas with regard to how widely celebrated it is. Stores that sell only Halloween-related paraphernalia open up a few months before the day and close shortly after it ends. But is Halloween a holiday that Christians should be observing?
The word "holiday" means "holy day." But there is nothing holy about Halloween. The root word of Halloween is "hallow," which means "holy, consecrated and set apart for service." If this holiday is hallowed, whose service is it set apart for? The answer to that question is very easy—Lucifer's!
Lucifer is a part of the demonic godhead. Remember, everything God has, the devil has a counterfeit. Halloween is a counterfeit holy day that is dedicated to celebrating the demonic trinity of : the Luciferian Spirit (the false father); the Antichrist Spirit (the false holy spirit); and the Spirit of Belial (the false son).
The key word in discussing Halloween is "dedicated." It is dedicated to darkness and is an accursed season. During Halloween, time-released curses are always loosed. A time-released curse is a period that has been set aside to release demonic activity and to ensnare souls in great measure.
You may ask, "Doesn't God have more power than the devil?" Yes, but He has given that power to us. If we do not walk in it, we will become the devil's prey. Witchcraft works through dirty hearts and wrong spirits.
During this period demons are assigned against those who participate in the rituals and festivities. These demons are automatically drawn to the fetishes that open doors for them to come into the lives of human beings. For example, most of the candy sold during this season has been dedicated and prayed over by witches.
I do not buy candy during the Halloween season. Curses are sent through the tricks and treats of the innocent whether they get it by going door to door or by purchasing it from the local grocery store. The demons cannot tell the difference.
Even the colors of Halloween (orange, brown and dark red) are dedicated. These colors are connected to the fall equinox, which is around the 20th or 21st of September each year and is sometimes called "Mabon." During this season witches are celebrating the changing of the seasons from summer to fall. They give praise to the gods for the demonic harvest. They pray to the gods of the elements (air, fire, water and earth).
Mother earth is highly celebrated during the fall demonic harvest. Witches praise mother earth by bringing her fruits, nuts and herbs. Demons are loosed during these acts of worship. When nice church folk lay out their pumpkins on the church lawn, fill their baskets with nuts and herbs, and fire up their bonfires, the demons get busy. They have no respect for the church grounds. They respect only the sacrifice and do not care if it comes from believers or non-believers.
Gathering around bonfires is a common practice in pagan worship. As I remember, the bonfires that I attended during homecoming week when I was in high school were always in the fall. I am amazed at how we ignorantly participate in pagan, occult rituals.
The gods of harvest that the witches worship during their fall festivals are the Corn King and the Harvest Lord. The devil is too stupid to understand that Jesus is the Lord of the Harvest 365 days a year. But we cannot be ignorant of the devices of the enemy. When we pray, we bind the powers of the strong men that people involved in the occult worship.
Monday, October 26, 2009
Saturday, October 24, 2009
Dating Often Becomes an End in Itself
The Seven Habits of Highly Defective Dating
I once talked to Marty, a guy in his mid-20s who enthusiastically told me about his girlfirend, Claire. They'd been dating for four years. She was a wonderful girl, he said and they had a terrific relationship.
I assumed sonce they'd been together so long that engagement must be on the horizon and asked, "When do you think you guys will get married?"
Marty was shocked that I'd even mentioned marriage and began to vigorously backpedal. "Well, gosh, we're just dating," he stammered. "That doesn't mean.. well, I don't know if I want to marry her,"
I wouldn't encourage anyone to marry someone just because they'd dated a long time. But I wondered what Marty needed to learn about Claire after four years together that would help him decide. I suspect that, like many relationships today, Marty and Claire were stuck in what I call "dating limbo". Instead of acting as a bridge between friendship and marriage, dating becomes the destination - not ending but not moving on, either.
Singles who grow accustomed to dating limbo often find it difficult to leave. It's so comfortable! Because they acn experience many of the emotional and, sadly, even physical privileges of marriage in their dating relationships, many people (men in particular) find little motivation for commiting themselves in marriage.
For the mans or woman who is ready to get married, the dating scene and the habits it encourages aren't helpful. It can seem like you're making something happen but you might just be getting into a holding pattern of one short-term relationship after another.
I assumed sonce they'd been together so long that engagement must be on the horizon and asked, "When do you think you guys will get married?"
Marty was shocked that I'd even mentioned marriage and began to vigorously backpedal. "Well, gosh, we're just dating," he stammered. "That doesn't mean.. well, I don't know if I want to marry her,"
I wouldn't encourage anyone to marry someone just because they'd dated a long time. But I wondered what Marty needed to learn about Claire after four years together that would help him decide. I suspect that, like many relationships today, Marty and Claire were stuck in what I call "dating limbo". Instead of acting as a bridge between friendship and marriage, dating becomes the destination - not ending but not moving on, either.
Singles who grow accustomed to dating limbo often find it difficult to leave. It's so comfortable! Because they acn experience many of the emotional and, sadly, even physical privileges of marriage in their dating relationships, many people (men in particular) find little motivation for commiting themselves in marriage.
For the mans or woman who is ready to get married, the dating scene and the habits it encourages aren't helpful. It can seem like you're making something happen but you might just be getting into a holding pattern of one short-term relationship after another.
Friday, October 23, 2009
Thursday, October 22, 2009
Dating Can Create an Artificial Environment for Evaluating Another Person's Character
The Seven Habits of Highly Defective Dating
Although most dating relationships don't head towards marriage, some - especially those among older singles - are motivated by marriage. People who sincerely want to find out if someone is potential marriage material need to understand that typical dating actually hinders that process. Dating creates an artificial environment for two people to interact in. As a result, each person can easily convey an equally artificial image.
Taking the example of a basketball hoop that can be adjusted to different heights. When lowered three feet from its normal setting, anyone can look like a pretty good basketball player. But the skill exists only because the standards are lowered - not playing in a real environment.
In a similar way, dating creates an artificial environment that doesn't require a person to accurately portray his or her positive and negative characteristics. On a date, a person can charm his or her way into a date's heart. He drives a nice car and pays for everything; she looks great. But who cares? Being fun on a date doesn't say anything about a person's character or ability to be a good husband or wife.
Part of the reason dating is fun is that it gives us a break from real life. For this reason, when I'm married I plan to make a habit of dating my wife. In marriage, you need to take breaks from the stress of kids and work; you need to just get away for a bit. But two people weighing the possibility of marriage need to make sure they don't interact only with the fun, romantic settings of dating. Their priority shouldn't be to get away from real life; they need a strong dose of objective reality! They need to watch each other in the real-life settings if family and friends. They need to watch each other serving and working. How does he interact with the people who know him best? How does she react when things don't go perfectly? When considering a potential mate, we need to find the answers to these kinds of questions - questions that dating won't answer.
Taking the example of a basketball hoop that can be adjusted to different heights. When lowered three feet from its normal setting, anyone can look like a pretty good basketball player. But the skill exists only because the standards are lowered - not playing in a real environment.
In a similar way, dating creates an artificial environment that doesn't require a person to accurately portray his or her positive and negative characteristics. On a date, a person can charm his or her way into a date's heart. He drives a nice car and pays for everything; she looks great. But who cares? Being fun on a date doesn't say anything about a person's character or ability to be a good husband or wife.
Part of the reason dating is fun is that it gives us a break from real life. For this reason, when I'm married I plan to make a habit of dating my wife. In marriage, you need to take breaks from the stress of kids and work; you need to just get away for a bit. But two people weighing the possibility of marriage need to make sure they don't interact only with the fun, romantic settings of dating. Their priority shouldn't be to get away from real life; they need a strong dose of objective reality! They need to watch each other in the real-life settings if family and friends. They need to watch each other serving and working. How does he interact with the people who know him best? How does she react when things don't go perfectly? When considering a potential mate, we need to find the answers to these kinds of questions - questions that dating won't answer.
Wednesday, October 21, 2009
Dating Can Cause Discontentment with God's Gift of Singleness
The Seven Habits of Highly Defective Dating
Sometimes we see children who are more impressed with the gift-wrapping than the gift itself. I can't help but think that God views our infatuation with short-term dating relationships much as some children's love for gift wrapping. A string of uncommitted dating relationships is not the gift!. God gives us singleness - a season of our lives unmatched in its boundless opportunities for growth, learning and service - and we view it as a chance to get bogged down in finding and keeping boyfriends and girlfriends. But we don't find the real beauty of singleness in pursuing romance with as many different people as we want. We find the real beauty in using our freedom to serve God with abandon.
Recreational dating causes dissatisfaction because it encourages a wrong use of this freedom. God has placed a desire in most men and women for marriage. Although we don't sin when we look forward to marriage, we might be guilty of poor stewardship of our singleness when we allow a desire for something God obviously doesn't have for us yet to rob our ability to enjoy and appreciate what He has given us. Dating plays a role in fostering this dissatisfaction because it gives single people just enough intimacy to make them wish they had more. Instead of enjoying the unique qualities of singleness, dating causes more people to focus on what they don't have.
Recreational dating causes dissatisfaction because it encourages a wrong use of this freedom. God has placed a desire in most men and women for marriage. Although we don't sin when we look forward to marriage, we might be guilty of poor stewardship of our singleness when we allow a desire for something God obviously doesn't have for us yet to rob our ability to enjoy and appreciate what He has given us. Dating plays a role in fostering this dissatisfaction because it gives single people just enough intimacy to make them wish they had more. Instead of enjoying the unique qualities of singleness, dating causes more people to focus on what they don't have.
Tuesday, October 20, 2009
STAY FAITHFUL & BE GRATEFUL
A Christian
Several years ago, a preacher from out-of-state accepted a call to a church in Houston, Texas.
Some weeks after he arrived, he had an occasion to ride the bus from his home to the downtown area. When he sat down, he discovered that the driver had accidentally given him a quarter too much change. As he considered what to do, he thought to himself, 'You'd better give the quarter back. It would be wrong to keep it.' Then he thought, 'Oh, forget it, it's only a quarter. Who would worry about this little amount? Anyway, the bus company gets too much fare; they will never miss it. Accept it as a 'gift from God' and keep quiet.'
When his stop came, he paused momentarily at the door, and then he handed the quarter to the driver and said,
'Here, you gave me too much change ' The driver, with a smile, replied, 'Aren't you the new preacher in town?'
'Yes' he replied.. 'Well, I have been thinking a lot lately about going somewhere to worship. I just wanted to see what you would do if I gave you too much change. I'll see you at church on Sunday.'
When the preacher stepped off of the bus, he literally grabbed the nearest light pole, held on, and said, 'Oh God, I almost sold your Son for a quarter.'
Our lives are the only Bible some people will ever read. This is a really scary example of how much people watch us as Christians, and will put us to the test! Always be on guard -- and remember -- You carry the name of Christ on your shoulders when you call yourself ' Christian.'
Watch your thoughts; they become words.
Watch your words; they become actions.
Watch your actions; they become habits.
Watch your habits; they become character.
Watch your character; it becomes your destiny.
The Will of God will never take you to where the Grace of God will not PROTECT you...
Stay FAITHFUL and Be GRATEFUL
Several years ago, a preacher from out-of-state accepted a call to a church in Houston, Texas.
Some weeks after he arrived, he had an occasion to ride the bus from his home to the downtown area. When he sat down, he discovered that the driver had accidentally given him a quarter too much change. As he considered what to do, he thought to himself, 'You'd better give the quarter back. It would be wrong to keep it.' Then he thought, 'Oh, forget it, it's only a quarter. Who would worry about this little amount? Anyway, the bus company gets too much fare; they will never miss it. Accept it as a 'gift from God' and keep quiet.'
When his stop came, he paused momentarily at the door, and then he handed the quarter to the driver and said,
'Here, you gave me too much change ' The driver, with a smile, replied, 'Aren't you the new preacher in town?'
'Yes' he replied.. 'Well, I have been thinking a lot lately about going somewhere to worship. I just wanted to see what you would do if I gave you too much change. I'll see you at church on Sunday.'
When the preacher stepped off of the bus, he literally grabbed the nearest light pole, held on, and said, 'Oh God, I almost sold your Son for a quarter.'
Our lives are the only Bible some people will ever read. This is a really scary example of how much people watch us as Christians, and will put us to the test! Always be on guard -- and remember -- You carry the name of Christ on your shoulders when you call yourself ' Christian.'
Watch your thoughts; they become words.
Watch your words; they become actions.
Watch your actions; they become habits.
Watch your habits; they become character.
Watch your character; it becomes your destiny.
The Will of God will never take you to where the Grace of God will not PROTECT you...
Stay FAITHFUL and Be GRATEFUL
Monday, October 19, 2009
YOU DON'T HAVE TO GUESS!
Many Christians stress out about making a decision because they wrongly believe they have to find God's one "right" answer to the problem. They spend countless hours struggling to determine God's "perfect will" for their lives--something God never told them to do.
"Perfect will"--the idea that God has a specific plan for us and that if we miss it, then we're living "Plan B"--is not a concept that's supported by Scripture. Our responsibility is to make sure we follow God's moral standards. Beyond that, we're free to choose the path for our life.
That's a difficult concept for many Christians to grasp. We want to believe that God must green-light all of our decisions--that he has a perfect will for each of us--one that we must find for ourselves. But is that really consistent with God's character and his interactions with us?
Throughout Scripture God presents himself using the analogy of a good father. Even if you don't have the best biological dad in the world, you know what a good father should be like.
I feel blessed because I do have a great father. My dad is an architect by trade, and his personality suits his chosen career. He's a very orderly, structured, and intentional person. If he weren't, then it would be hard for him to get anything built. (And if he weren't meticulous, then the buildings he designed would most likely fall down.) I see my dad as a significant creator who possesses many of God's attributes of orderliness, purpose, and imagination.
Yet as good a father as he is, my dad doesn't expect me to depend on him to make every decision for me. Can you imagine what my life might be like if he did?
"Hi, Dad, it's me. My friends want to go to lunch. Should I go with them?"
"Yes, son, you should."
"Where should we go?"
"You should go to Wendy's."
"What should I order?"
"You should order a Spicy Chicken Sandwich meal."
"Should I biggie-size it?"
"No, son, you must not biggie-size it."
I think you get the idea. It would be ridiculous to expect my father to have a firm opinion on all of those decisions. My father taught me how to tell right from wrong and how to make good choices. Therefore, I'm free to make decisions within those parameters without getting into trouble.
God, the best Dad we could ever hope for, has done the same thing for us. He's given us the boundaries of his moral standards and the freedom to make our own decisions within those boundaries.
**
stories@heart4teens.com
Taken from "Wisdom On... Making Good Decisions" by Mark Matlock, copyright 2008, Zondervan/Youth Specialties. Used by permission. Release date January 2008.
"Perfect will"--the idea that God has a specific plan for us and that if we miss it, then we're living "Plan B"--is not a concept that's supported by Scripture. Our responsibility is to make sure we follow God's moral standards. Beyond that, we're free to choose the path for our life.
That's a difficult concept for many Christians to grasp. We want to believe that God must green-light all of our decisions--that he has a perfect will for each of us--one that we must find for ourselves. But is that really consistent with God's character and his interactions with us?
Throughout Scripture God presents himself using the analogy of a good father. Even if you don't have the best biological dad in the world, you know what a good father should be like.
I feel blessed because I do have a great father. My dad is an architect by trade, and his personality suits his chosen career. He's a very orderly, structured, and intentional person. If he weren't, then it would be hard for him to get anything built. (And if he weren't meticulous, then the buildings he designed would most likely fall down.) I see my dad as a significant creator who possesses many of God's attributes of orderliness, purpose, and imagination.
Yet as good a father as he is, my dad doesn't expect me to depend on him to make every decision for me. Can you imagine what my life might be like if he did?
"Hi, Dad, it's me. My friends want to go to lunch. Should I go with them?"
"Yes, son, you should."
"Where should we go?"
"You should go to Wendy's."
"What should I order?"
"You should order a Spicy Chicken Sandwich meal."
"Should I biggie-size it?"
"No, son, you must not biggie-size it."
I think you get the idea. It would be ridiculous to expect my father to have a firm opinion on all of those decisions. My father taught me how to tell right from wrong and how to make good choices. Therefore, I'm free to make decisions within those parameters without getting into trouble.
God, the best Dad we could ever hope for, has done the same thing for us. He's given us the boundaries of his moral standards and the freedom to make our own decisions within those boundaries.
**
stories@heart4teens.com
Taken from "Wisdom On... Making Good Decisions" by Mark Matlock, copyright 2008, Zondervan/Youth Specialties. Used by permission. Release date January 2008.
Sunday, October 18, 2009
What Man Could Not Do, Jesus Did
What Man Could Not Do, Jesus Did
By Victor King
A story of how the amazing grace of God changes everything
You are about to read the Great manifestation Works of Jesus Christ………
From a gangster to an ambassador of the gospel.
I just want to share with you what the grace of God has done for me in my life.
I was a born in a Christian family. Despite hating to go to church, I was forced to by my parents. They sent me to a Christian school but that didn’t help. When I reached secondary school, that’s when I was influenced by my friends and got myself involved in gangsterism, smoking and skipping school. Things were turning from bad to worse as it became a lifestyle and a bondage to me.
I started stealing, vandalizing, drinking and getting into fights. My folks got to know about it and tried to talk me out of it but it didn’t work as I was very rude, hot-tempered and vulgar. My teachers, the school staff, my relatives, good friends and even counselors tried talking to me but none of them got through me.
My parents wanted to send me to the boys’ home but I was expelled from school because of my attitude and attendance. I became a school dropout at the age of 17.
Being a dropout did not really matter to me. Rather, it gave me more reasons to become a ‘full time’ gangster. I frequented pubs with my gang members daily. I became a heavy smoker and I got hooked on alcohol. I was full of obscenities and I got addicted to pornography. I started womanizing and stayed away from home most of the time.
There were times I got involved in armed robberies. Most of my friends were drug addicts and ex-convicts. It became a bondage to me as I started living this ‘troubled life’. Sometimes, I would worship idols and visit temples to pray with my friends. I was so lost. I became the worst guy in my family. Nobody could change me not even the army.
Many of them thought that I would change for the better when I was drafted into the Singapore Armed Forces but unfortunately, no. I managed to get myself into the army prison (detention barracks) for going A.W.O.L and my bad attitude. I was also brought back to the police station a couple times and my parents had to come and bail me out. I was a burden to them but I didn’t care!
But during those moments, there was a cry within. My lifestyle headed me to the prison many times, but I would always escape without getting caught. I believe God preserved me.
This whole bondage of the devil came to an end just few years ago. I had quite a number of girlfriends in the past and most of them were unbelievers. 5 years ago, I got to know this girl who was a Christian and she brought me to her church at Suntec City called the New Creation Church. It was the third time I felt Jesus touched me in a church, and this time I felt warmth all over me and I started crying. I felt so in love and loved but I didn’t know with whom. All I knew was that it was a love beyond a human’s love. That day, I received Jesus as my Lord and Savior.
Life Transformation
One thing I know, that my life was not the same after that. As time went on, Jesus delivered me from so many bondages. Nine years of heavy smoking was gone, six years of alcoholism was gone and as time went by, God supernaturally took me out of the gang, delivered me from vulgarities, anger, womanizing and many more bad habits like pornography and lust. The Lord made me see women in a different way.
I became a new creation. I was also healed of a 10 year urinary bladder problem. Before this, I would go to the toilet for as many as five to seven times in the night, but by the grace the God, I don’t have this problem today. Now, I can just sleep through the night. Amazing grace! The people around me were shocked. With man it may seem impossible but with God, all things are possible.
For sin shall has no dominion over us for we are not under law but under grace.
I believe that God blessed me to be a blessing. I want to spread this Good News that only Jesus can make a difference in our lives and Jesus died for all our sins. He is merciful to our unrighteousness, sin and lawlessness. He remembers no more and there is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus!
People are going to the world and things for answers but truth is, Jesus is the answer.
Not only has the grace of God transformed my life, I now have a great relationship with Jesus. Whenever I’m going through problems, the grace of God makes me run to Him. He has delivered and carried me through and from all my problems.
There were times when I felt like giving up and the problems were too big and overtaking me (even to the point of suicide) but He carried me through my storms. Even when I fell in my failures and sin, the Holy Spirit in me Always reminds and convicts me how Righteous I am in Christ and that my sins and lawless deeds GOD does not remember anymore because of the Finished Work of Jesus.
What Jesus did for me is priceless and beyond human strength. Jesus loves you too much and what He did for me by His Grace, He can do the same for you.
Now, I have a good problem, I can’t stop talking and preaching about Jesus. Jesus is so real.
Thank you so much for reading the wonderful Works of Jesus Christ.
Shalom
By Victor King
A story of how the amazing grace of God changes everything
You are about to read the Great manifestation Works of Jesus Christ………
From a gangster to an ambassador of the gospel.
I just want to share with you what the grace of God has done for me in my life.
I was a born in a Christian family. Despite hating to go to church, I was forced to by my parents. They sent me to a Christian school but that didn’t help. When I reached secondary school, that’s when I was influenced by my friends and got myself involved in gangsterism, smoking and skipping school. Things were turning from bad to worse as it became a lifestyle and a bondage to me.
I started stealing, vandalizing, drinking and getting into fights. My folks got to know about it and tried to talk me out of it but it didn’t work as I was very rude, hot-tempered and vulgar. My teachers, the school staff, my relatives, good friends and even counselors tried talking to me but none of them got through me.
My parents wanted to send me to the boys’ home but I was expelled from school because of my attitude and attendance. I became a school dropout at the age of 17.
Being a dropout did not really matter to me. Rather, it gave me more reasons to become a ‘full time’ gangster. I frequented pubs with my gang members daily. I became a heavy smoker and I got hooked on alcohol. I was full of obscenities and I got addicted to pornography. I started womanizing and stayed away from home most of the time.
There were times I got involved in armed robberies. Most of my friends were drug addicts and ex-convicts. It became a bondage to me as I started living this ‘troubled life’. Sometimes, I would worship idols and visit temples to pray with my friends. I was so lost. I became the worst guy in my family. Nobody could change me not even the army.
Many of them thought that I would change for the better when I was drafted into the Singapore Armed Forces but unfortunately, no. I managed to get myself into the army prison (detention barracks) for going A.W.O.L and my bad attitude. I was also brought back to the police station a couple times and my parents had to come and bail me out. I was a burden to them but I didn’t care!
But during those moments, there was a cry within. My lifestyle headed me to the prison many times, but I would always escape without getting caught. I believe God preserved me.
This whole bondage of the devil came to an end just few years ago. I had quite a number of girlfriends in the past and most of them were unbelievers. 5 years ago, I got to know this girl who was a Christian and she brought me to her church at Suntec City called the New Creation Church. It was the third time I felt Jesus touched me in a church, and this time I felt warmth all over me and I started crying. I felt so in love and loved but I didn’t know with whom. All I knew was that it was a love beyond a human’s love. That day, I received Jesus as my Lord and Savior.
Life Transformation
One thing I know, that my life was not the same after that. As time went on, Jesus delivered me from so many bondages. Nine years of heavy smoking was gone, six years of alcoholism was gone and as time went by, God supernaturally took me out of the gang, delivered me from vulgarities, anger, womanizing and many more bad habits like pornography and lust. The Lord made me see women in a different way.
I became a new creation. I was also healed of a 10 year urinary bladder problem. Before this, I would go to the toilet for as many as five to seven times in the night, but by the grace the God, I don’t have this problem today. Now, I can just sleep through the night. Amazing grace! The people around me were shocked. With man it may seem impossible but with God, all things are possible.
For sin shall has no dominion over us for we are not under law but under grace.
I believe that God blessed me to be a blessing. I want to spread this Good News that only Jesus can make a difference in our lives and Jesus died for all our sins. He is merciful to our unrighteousness, sin and lawlessness. He remembers no more and there is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus!
People are going to the world and things for answers but truth is, Jesus is the answer.
Not only has the grace of God transformed my life, I now have a great relationship with Jesus. Whenever I’m going through problems, the grace of God makes me run to Him. He has delivered and carried me through and from all my problems.
There were times when I felt like giving up and the problems were too big and overtaking me (even to the point of suicide) but He carried me through my storms. Even when I fell in my failures and sin, the Holy Spirit in me Always reminds and convicts me how Righteous I am in Christ and that my sins and lawless deeds GOD does not remember anymore because of the Finished Work of Jesus.
What Jesus did for me is priceless and beyond human strength. Jesus loves you too much and what He did for me by His Grace, He can do the same for you.
Now, I have a good problem, I can’t stop talking and preaching about Jesus. Jesus is so real.
Thank you so much for reading the wonderful Works of Jesus Christ.
Shalom
Saturday, October 17, 2009
Dating Can Distract Young Adults from Their Primary Responsibility of Preparing for the Future
The Seven Habits of Highly Defective Dating
We cannot live in the future, but neglecting our current obligations will disqualify us for tomorro's responsibilities. Being distracted by love is not such a bad thing - unless God wants you doind something else.
One of the saddest tendencies of dating is to distract young adults from developing their God-given abilities and skills. Instead of serving in their local church, instead of equipping themselves with the character, education and experience necessary to succeed in life, many allow themselves to be consumed by the present needs that dating emphasizes.
Maintaining a relationship takes a lot of time and energy. Spending countless hours talking, writing, thinking and often worrying about their relationship steals enegry from other pursuits. The relationship could swallow up time that could have been spent developing skills and exploring new opportunities.
Dating may help you practice being a good boyfriend or girlfriend, but are these the skills we need for marriage? Even if you're going out with the person you will one day marry, a preoccupation with being the perfect boyfriend or girlfriend now can actually hinder you from being the future husband or wife that person will one day need.
One of the saddest tendencies of dating is to distract young adults from developing their God-given abilities and skills. Instead of serving in their local church, instead of equipping themselves with the character, education and experience necessary to succeed in life, many allow themselves to be consumed by the present needs that dating emphasizes.
Maintaining a relationship takes a lot of time and energy. Spending countless hours talking, writing, thinking and often worrying about their relationship steals enegry from other pursuits. The relationship could swallow up time that could have been spent developing skills and exploring new opportunities.
Dating may help you practice being a good boyfriend or girlfriend, but are these the skills we need for marriage? Even if you're going out with the person you will one day marry, a preoccupation with being the perfect boyfriend or girlfriend now can actually hinder you from being the future husband or wife that person will one day need.
Friday, October 16, 2009
Dating Often Isolates a Couple from Other Vital Relationships
The Seven Habits of Highly Defective Dating
By it's very definition, dating is about two people focusing on each other. Unfortunately, in most cases the rest of the world fades into the background. If you've ever felt like a third wheel when hanging out with two friends who are dating each other, you know how true this is.
Now, in a relationship where both people are prepared to move toward marriage, giving the relationship primary attention is not wrong. To make a wise choice about marrying someone, it's important to focus on getting to know that person well. But even in serious relationships it's not wise to isolate yourself from others.
For people who are't ready for commitment, this dating tendency can be especially detrimental. Christians need to take this seriously. Why? First, because when we allow one relationship to crowd out others, we lose perspective. In Proverbs 15:22 we read:
Of course we can make this same mistake in any number of non-romantic relationships. But we face this problem more often in dating relationships because these relationships involve our hears and emotions. And because dating focuses on the plans of a couple, major issues related to marriage, family and faith are likely at stake.
And if two people haven't defined their level of commitment, they're particularly at risk. You put yourself in a precasious position if you isolate yourself from the people who love and support you because you dive wholeheartedly into a romantic relationship not grounded in commitment. In Passion & Purity, Elisabeth Elliot states:
Perhaps you've done a similar thing. Or maybe you know the pain and frustration of being put on the back burner for the sake of a friend's boyfriend or girlfriend. The exclusive attention so oftne expected in dating relationships has a tendedncy to isolate them from the friends who love them most, family members who know them best and sadly, even God, whose will is far more important than any romantic interest
Now, in a relationship where both people are prepared to move toward marriage, giving the relationship primary attention is not wrong. To make a wise choice about marrying someone, it's important to focus on getting to know that person well. But even in serious relationships it's not wise to isolate yourself from others.
For people who are't ready for commitment, this dating tendency can be especially detrimental. Christians need to take this seriously. Why? First, because when we allow one relationship to crowd out others, we lose perspective. In Proverbs 15:22 we read:
22 Without counsel, plans go awry, But in the multitude of counselors they are established.If we make our decisions about life based solely on the influence of one relationship, we'll probably make poor judgements.
Of course we can make this same mistake in any number of non-romantic relationships. But we face this problem more often in dating relationships because these relationships involve our hears and emotions. And because dating focuses on the plans of a couple, major issues related to marriage, family and faith are likely at stake.
And if two people haven't defined their level of commitment, they're particularly at risk. You put yourself in a precasious position if you isolate yourself from the people who love and support you because you dive wholeheartedly into a romantic relationship not grounded in commitment. In Passion & Purity, Elisabeth Elliot states:
Unless a man is prepared to ask a woman to be his wife, what right has he to claim her exclusive attention? Unless she has been asked to marry him, why would a sensible woman promise any man her exclusive attention?How many people end dating relationships only to find their ties to other friends severed?
Perhaps you've done a similar thing. Or maybe you know the pain and frustration of being put on the back burner for the sake of a friend's boyfriend or girlfriend. The exclusive attention so oftne expected in dating relationships has a tendedncy to isolate them from the friends who love them most, family members who know them best and sadly, even God, whose will is far more important than any romantic interest
Thursday, October 15, 2009
What Passion Litmus Test?
What Passion Litmus Test?
By Rachel Chew
Can we ever measure passion or put a finger on what passion looks or sounds like?
By Rachel Chew
Can we ever measure passion or put a finger on what passion looks or sounds like?
They say that if you’re not loud, you’re probably dead. They say that if you’re not giving your loudest shout, you’re not passionate. They say our King deserves it. Our King also, most probably, deserves a lot more things. Yet we find people who have either left or changed churches because of it. Some get disappointed and confused. They’re left speechless, literally.
We hear from friends coming back from a megachurch in a neighbouring (almost) country. We’ve heard it from the pulpit, even lead worshippers (the worship leader is ultimately the Holy Spirit); if it’s loud, bright, and can be seen and heard from a mile away, it’s definitely passion.
What’s that? I can’t hear you. Oh, you’re probably not passionate or *cough* Christian.
Extreme? Maybe. Out of context? Possibly. But haven’t we felt more ’alive’ when everyone sings their heart out and give their all in worship? Haven’t we felt as though we wanted to grow up and be just like them?
We talk about passion and equate it with how much time we do ‘quiet time’ or how many praise and worship songs we know. Lifting our hands at the right climaxes, clapping in beat and jumping all describe a ‘passionate’ person. It’s all rage and hype. Stepping out of our comfort zone means leaving our seats/pews and going upfront to um, rave… or whatever you call it. While we debate over worship styles and congregation enthusiasm in their responses, people’s needs are still not met and the poor are still poor.
True, passion starts with the individual, but it doesn’t have to end there. True passion always flows out, not clogging up within the four walls of ‘church’. Jesus was (and is) passionate. In fact, the word ‘passion’ came from the Latin word passi?, referring to the sufferings of Jesus or a martyr. He gave passion meaning. Today, being that passionate would be masochism. And no, black leather and whips will never be popular within ’churchy’ circles and neither was that what Jesus meant.
Jesus said to His disciples, “If anyone would come after Me, he must deny himself and take up his cross and follow Me” (Matt 16:24). He calls us to passion, not merely to a passionate worship service, but to a life that follows after Him. It is a life that is uncomfortable, one that shakes us from our little boats and into the water. It means laying down our rights (to a home, money, fame or getting even) and picking up our cross. It’s a divine exchange of your life for His. And it happens daily.
Passion is not passive. Unfortunately, while we are passionate about the idea of passion, Jesus was (and is) passionate because He is compassionate*. We talk about following Jesus, but most of the time, we only follow Him to church and after service, we follow our stomachs. Jesus’ mission on earth was to the oppressed, poor, blind and the prisoners. God is always near the widows and fatherless. We can either take it metaphorically or literally—or better, both. There was a trend back in the 90s when the Christian subculture was famous for the WWJD (What Would Jesus Do) bracelets, way before the current silicon bracelet fad. Catchy phrase, but if we really want to take it further, we should be asking what is Jesus doing and where is Jesus now. The present tense makes more sense because He is already here and all we need to do is join Him.
So where is Jesus? Where is He working? You say you have passion, live it. Leave the warm pews and go somewhere your butt will freeze because you have just given your coat to a beggar. Some may say you should start with the ‘small’ things first, i.e. taking out the trash in church or arranging seats before service, but truthfully, do we all think that God sees these acts as small? If all sin is sin to God, then all ’noble’ acts are equal because it is the Christian way of life. A life of love requires some form of self-giving and no service is smaller or more noble than another. Start with something immediate, do something you’d least likely do; whether it’s cleaning up your colleagues used cups and dishes or arming yourself with plastic bags to clean up your town. (Yes, we pay taxes for a reason. But it’s easier for us to give money than time and effort.)
Living selflessly is not easy, neither is it comfortable or ’natural’ in the worldly sense, but it is Christ’s passion, isn’t it? Having nails driven into His body was definitely not comfortable. Worship styles don’t even begin to describe it. Let’s not just talk about passion, let’s live a passion-filled life. Don’t just preach the gospel, be the gospel—the good news—to the poor, the oppressed and the needy. We’re the Church, the body of Christ, not a building. Jesus is all about the people and we should be too. If Jesus never changed His mission, why should we? It’s time we take the backseat, put the needs of others first and break down the walls that separate us from ’them’.
If it’s comfortable, it’s not passion.
*Compassion comes from the Late Latin word, compati; com (together) + pati (to suffer). Look up ‘passion’.
Wednesday, October 14, 2009
Dating Often Mistakes a Physical Relationship for Love
The Seven Habits of Highly Defective Dating
When we consider that our culture as a whole regards the words love and sex as interchangeable,we shouldn't be surprise that many dating relationships make physical attraction and sexual intimacy for true love. Sadly, many Christian dating relationships reflect this false mindset.
When we examine the progression of most relationships, we can clearly see how dating can encourage this substitution. First, as we pointed out, most often, dating isn't a pursuit of commitment. For this reason, many dating relationships begin with physical attraction. The underlying attitude is that a person's primary value comes from the way he/she looks. Even before a kiss has been given, the physical, sensual aspect of the relationship has taken priority.
Next, the relationship often steamrolls toward intimacy. Because dating doesn't require commitment, the two people involved allow the needs and passions of the moment to take center stage. The couple doesn't look at each other as possible life partners or weigh the responsibilties of marriage. Instead, they focus on the demands of the present. And with that mindset, the couple's physical relationship can easily become the focus.
Sadly, many couples gauge the seriousness of their relationship by the level of their physical involvement. Two people who date each other want to feel that they're special to each other, and they can concretely express this through physical intimacy. They begin to distinguish their special relationship through hand-holding, kissing and everything else that follows. For this reason, many people believe that going out with someone means physical involvement.
Focusing on the physical is plainly sinful. God demands sexual purity. And He does this because He is holy. He also does it for our own good. Physical involvement can distort two people's perspective of each other and lead to unwise choices. God also knows we'll carry the memories of our past physical involvements into marriage. He doesn't want us to live with guilt and regret.
Physical involvement can make two people feel close. But if many people really examined the focus of their dating relationships, they'd probably discover that all they have in common is lust.
When we examine the progression of most relationships, we can clearly see how dating can encourage this substitution. First, as we pointed out, most often, dating isn't a pursuit of commitment. For this reason, many dating relationships begin with physical attraction. The underlying attitude is that a person's primary value comes from the way he/she looks. Even before a kiss has been given, the physical, sensual aspect of the relationship has taken priority.
Next, the relationship often steamrolls toward intimacy. Because dating doesn't require commitment, the two people involved allow the needs and passions of the moment to take center stage. The couple doesn't look at each other as possible life partners or weigh the responsibilties of marriage. Instead, they focus on the demands of the present. And with that mindset, the couple's physical relationship can easily become the focus.
Sadly, many couples gauge the seriousness of their relationship by the level of their physical involvement. Two people who date each other want to feel that they're special to each other, and they can concretely express this through physical intimacy. They begin to distinguish their special relationship through hand-holding, kissing and everything else that follows. For this reason, many people believe that going out with someone means physical involvement.
Focusing on the physical is plainly sinful. God demands sexual purity. And He does this because He is holy. He also does it for our own good. Physical involvement can distort two people's perspective of each other and lead to unwise choices. God also knows we'll carry the memories of our past physical involvements into marriage. He doesn't want us to live with guilt and regret.
Physical involvement can make two people feel close. But if many people really examined the focus of their dating relationships, they'd probably discover that all they have in common is lust.
Tuesday, October 13, 2009
Dating Tends to Skip the Friendship Stage of a Relationship
The Seven Habits of Highly Defective Dating
One-on-one dating has the tendency to move a guy and girl beyond friendship and toward romance too quickly.
Have you ever known someone who worried about dating a longtime friend? If you have, you probably heard that person say something like this: "He asked me out, but I'm just afraid that if wwe start actually dating it will change out friendship." What is this person really saying? People make statements like that, whether they realize it or not, recognize that dating encourages romnatic expectations. In a true friendship you don't feel pressured by knowing that you 'like' the other person or that he or she 'likes' you back. You feel free to be yourself and do things together without spending three hours in front of the mirror making sure you look perfect.
CS Lewis describes friendship as two people walking side by side toward a common goal. Their mutual interest brings them together. Skipping the commonality stage by going on one-on-one dates focuses on the 'coupleness'.
In dating, romantic attraction is often the cornerstone of the relationship. The premise of dating is "I'm attracted to you; therefore, let's get to know each other." The premise of friendship, on the other hand, is "We're interested in the same things; let's enjoy these common interests together." If romantic attraction forms after developing a friendship, it's an added bonus.
Have you ever known someone who worried about dating a longtime friend? If you have, you probably heard that person say something like this: "He asked me out, but I'm just afraid that if wwe start actually dating it will change out friendship." What is this person really saying? People make statements like that, whether they realize it or not, recognize that dating encourages romnatic expectations. In a true friendship you don't feel pressured by knowing that you 'like' the other person or that he or she 'likes' you back. You feel free to be yourself and do things together without spending three hours in front of the mirror making sure you look perfect.
CS Lewis describes friendship as two people walking side by side toward a common goal. Their mutual interest brings them together. Skipping the commonality stage by going on one-on-one dates focuses on the 'coupleness'.
In dating, romantic attraction is often the cornerstone of the relationship. The premise of dating is "I'm attracted to you; therefore, let's get to know each other." The premise of friendship, on the other hand, is "We're interested in the same things; let's enjoy these common interests together." If romantic attraction forms after developing a friendship, it's an added bonus.
Intimacy without commitment is defrauding. Intimacy without friendship is superficial. A relationship based solely on physical attraction and romantic feelings will last only as long as the feelings last
Monday, October 12, 2009
One Stormy Night
One Stormy Night
By Sandra Chin
The love bug sometimes hits you at the oddest times. But hey, you don't have to place yourself on the hit list especially when you aren't looking.
Ever had a one stormy night episode before? That day when everything seems to go wrong, you feel depressed, handling the situation all alone. It’s at that very lowest point of your day or life, and in walks… a guy or girl into your “moment” and offers a shoulder to cry on or a listening ear. Wham! Bam! Right there and then you get hit by the love bug! A blinding moment of mixed emotions! Especially, when the other party has been secretly interested in you for a while now(or vice versa).
Well, my one episode happened some eons ago when I had a bad week with my immediate supervisor. Everything I did was wrong, she was losing patience and I was losing confidence every time she gave the “look”. Well, the final straw broke my day and I was left moping in the office wondering how to clear up the mistakes. Right then a call came from a guy colleague who worked at the bank on the ground floor (I was on the 14th floor) who was trying so hard to get my attention and take me on a date. I had on several occasions turned him down saying I was not into any relationships at that time. But on that “one stormy night”, he walked into my “moment” with a listening ear and a packet of “tong sui”(sweet dessert)!! Oh dear!! I went for it as I just needed to pour my heart out! Looking back, (What was I thinking!), there could have been some other girlfriend, friend or even my mom, to talk to than to talk to an almost stranger.
That “moment” turned into a two year relationship that had its ups and downs and a very controlling boyfriend! As much as he was a nice person, there were several times I asked myself, why am I dating this guy? We were not compatible, and I think most days I was just settling for a man for fear I may not meet another guy! Sound Familiar? That is so not right! Well, the relationship finally ended on note that I had my “calling” to pursue and he was not comfortable to flow with it, so we broke up. Phew! That was a God moment that has brought me years later, to today, happily married to an awesome man and a colorful story to tell!!
My two cents worth of advice for those who may fall into a “one stormy night” moment:
* never pour your heart to a stranger, especially the opposite sex
* don’t start any romantic relationship at your lowest point of emotions even if that “someone” is a good friend who has been secretly admiring you
* don’t allow yourself to think that no one cares because there will be someone in your circle of friends with a listening ear
* if there is this nice person who just takes your breath away, do give yourself time to recover from your state of lowness, get back to the place of confidence, feel great about things around you then perhaps have that lunch with him or her. Get to know each other better instead of being swept up by both the high and low emotions.
* if you happen to fall into a romantic relationship that’s not working out, do the right thing, get out of it!
* don’t SETTLE for any relationship, you are much more valuable and precious than you know. You are worth the wait!
By Sandra Chin
The love bug sometimes hits you at the oddest times. But hey, you don't have to place yourself on the hit list especially when you aren't looking.
Ever had a one stormy night episode before? That day when everything seems to go wrong, you feel depressed, handling the situation all alone. It’s at that very lowest point of your day or life, and in walks… a guy or girl into your “moment” and offers a shoulder to cry on or a listening ear. Wham! Bam! Right there and then you get hit by the love bug! A blinding moment of mixed emotions! Especially, when the other party has been secretly interested in you for a while now(or vice versa).
Well, my one episode happened some eons ago when I had a bad week with my immediate supervisor. Everything I did was wrong, she was losing patience and I was losing confidence every time she gave the “look”. Well, the final straw broke my day and I was left moping in the office wondering how to clear up the mistakes. Right then a call came from a guy colleague who worked at the bank on the ground floor (I was on the 14th floor) who was trying so hard to get my attention and take me on a date. I had on several occasions turned him down saying I was not into any relationships at that time. But on that “one stormy night”, he walked into my “moment” with a listening ear and a packet of “tong sui”(sweet dessert)!! Oh dear!! I went for it as I just needed to pour my heart out! Looking back, (What was I thinking!), there could have been some other girlfriend, friend or even my mom, to talk to than to talk to an almost stranger.
That “moment” turned into a two year relationship that had its ups and downs and a very controlling boyfriend! As much as he was a nice person, there were several times I asked myself, why am I dating this guy? We were not compatible, and I think most days I was just settling for a man for fear I may not meet another guy! Sound Familiar? That is so not right! Well, the relationship finally ended on note that I had my “calling” to pursue and he was not comfortable to flow with it, so we broke up. Phew! That was a God moment that has brought me years later, to today, happily married to an awesome man and a colorful story to tell!!
My two cents worth of advice for those who may fall into a “one stormy night” moment:
* never pour your heart to a stranger, especially the opposite sex
* don’t start any romantic relationship at your lowest point of emotions even if that “someone” is a good friend who has been secretly admiring you
* don’t allow yourself to think that no one cares because there will be someone in your circle of friends with a listening ear
* if there is this nice person who just takes your breath away, do give yourself time to recover from your state of lowness, get back to the place of confidence, feel great about things around you then perhaps have that lunch with him or her. Get to know each other better instead of being swept up by both the high and low emotions.
* if you happen to fall into a romantic relationship that’s not working out, do the right thing, get out of it!
* don’t SETTLE for any relationship, you are much more valuable and precious than you know. You are worth the wait!
Sunday, October 11, 2009
Love & Faithfulness
What we fail to see is that the intimacy we experience in out string of emotional hook-ups is counterfeit. Romantic passion is sweetest when it is growing out of a relationship that's deepening in devotion.
The joy of intimacy if the reward of commitment.
Throughout the Bible we see that the Little Relationshi Principle (above) is an important aspect of true love. In the Old Testament, God makes a covenant - a binding commitment - with the people of Israel so that they can know Him intimately. The institution of marriage is founded on the same principle. A man and woman become one flesh and enjoy the deepest intimacy with each other only after they have made a public promise to love each other for life.
The way of sin is to diverce the two. In Proverbs 7 we read of the seductress, who lures her victim with the offer of romantic and sexual pleasures devoid of responsibility.
Pursuing intimacy without commitment awakens desires - emotional & physical - that neither person can justly meet. In 1 Thess 4:6 the Bible calls this "defrauding", ripping someone off by raising expectations but not delivering on the promise. Pastor Stephen Olford describes defrausding as "arousing hunger we cannot righteously satisfy" - promising something we can not or will not provide.
The joy of intimacy if the reward of commitment.
Throughout the Bible we see that the Little Relationshi Principle (above) is an important aspect of true love. In the Old Testament, God makes a covenant - a binding commitment - with the people of Israel so that they can know Him intimately. The institution of marriage is founded on the same principle. A man and woman become one flesh and enjoy the deepest intimacy with each other only after they have made a public promise to love each other for life.
Proverbs 3:3 - Let not mercy and truth forsake you; Bind them around your neck, Write them on the tablet of your heartGod wants love and faithfulness to be connected. In His plan, the personal benefits of an intimate relationship - emotional or sexual - are always closely linked to self-sacrificial love and commitment to another person's long term good.
The way of sin is to diverce the two. In Proverbs 7 we read of the seductress, who lures her victim with the offer of romantic and sexual pleasures devoid of responsibility.
18 Come, let us take our fill of love until morning; Let us delight ourselves with love.This is how sin works. It calls us to "enjoy ourselved with love" without worrying about the good of others. It offfers intimaacy without obligation.
Pursuing intimacy without commitment awakens desires - emotional & physical - that neither person can justly meet. In 1 Thess 4:6 the Bible calls this "defrauding", ripping someone off by raising expectations but not delivering on the promise. Pastor Stephen Olford describes defrausding as "arousing hunger we cannot righteously satisfy" - promising something we can not or will not provide.
Intimacy without commitment, like icing without cake, can be sweet, but it ends up making us sick.
Saturday, October 10, 2009
The Joy of Intimacy is the Reward of Commitment
An intimate relationship is a beautiful experience that God wants us to enjoy. After all, He stated that it wasn't good for man to alone and created the woman to perfectly complement him and help him (Gen 2:18). But God has made the fulfilment of intimacy a by-product of commitment-based love. If we want to experience the goodness of His plan, we need to reconnect the pursuit of intimacy with the pursuit of commitment:
There are many different kinds of intimate relationships in life. We can be intimate with a friend, with a family member, with a co-worker, but the deepest, most meaningful of intimate relationships (outside of a Christian's relationship with God) is the one between a husband and wife who share not only their hearts but also their bodies - in sexual intimacy, two people know each other in a profound way.
What each of these relationships has in common is trust. We are intimate with those people who have proven their faithfulness to us, people who have shown over time that they will be careful to guard what we have given of ourselves. We're intimate with people who are committed to us.
You might say that intimacy between a man and a woman is the icing on the cake of a relationship headed toward marriage. And if we look at intimacy that way, then it becomes obvious that most of our dating relationships are all icing. They usually lack a purpose or a clear destination. In most cases, especially when we're younger, dating is short term,serving the needs of the moment. We date because we want to enjoy the emotional and physical benefits of intimacy without the responsibility of real commitment.
the joy of intimacy is the reward of commitmentAll of us want intimacy. It means being close to someone. It's being vulnerable, open, and dependent. It's giving to and receiving from another person the deepest parts of who we are - our hopes, our fears, our secrets, our affections. An intimate relationship in which we know and are known by another human is one of the most fulfilling and precious parts of life - it's a gift from God.
There are many different kinds of intimate relationships in life. We can be intimate with a friend, with a family member, with a co-worker, but the deepest, most meaningful of intimate relationships (outside of a Christian's relationship with God) is the one between a husband and wife who share not only their hearts but also their bodies - in sexual intimacy, two people know each other in a profound way.
What each of these relationships has in common is trust. We are intimate with those people who have proven their faithfulness to us, people who have shown over time that they will be careful to guard what we have given of ourselves. We're intimate with people who are committed to us.
You might say that intimacy between a man and a woman is the icing on the cake of a relationship headed toward marriage. And if we look at intimacy that way, then it becomes obvious that most of our dating relationships are all icing. They usually lack a purpose or a clear destination. In most cases, especially when we're younger, dating is short term,serving the needs of the moment. We date because we want to enjoy the emotional and physical benefits of intimacy without the responsibility of real commitment.
Friday, October 9, 2009
Knowing What's Best
Philippians 1:9-10: 9 And this I pray, that your love may abound still more and more in knowledge and all discernment, 10 that you may approve the things that are excellent, that you may be sincere and without offense till the day of Christ,The way we love others should constantly grow and deepen in its knowledge and insight. And when our love grows in knowledge, we can more readily 'discern what is best' for our lives. Don't we all desperately need that discernment?
After all, when we engage in guy-girl relationships, we're not always choosing between absolute wrong and absolute right. Often the choice is between what's good and what's best...
... Because there is not biblical command not to date, this is an area that we each need to evaluate in light of our own maturity, our motive and the other person involved. The decision requires wisdom.
This is where it's so important that our love for others be shaped by God's love for us. This kind of love looks beyond personal desires and the gratification of the moment. It looks at the big picture: serving others and glorifying God.
- Stop seeing members of the opposite sex as potential girlfriends/boyfriends - discover the richness of true friendship
- Stop worrying about whom you are going to marry & start trusting God's timing - uncover the potential of serving God as a single
- Stop flirting with temptation in one-on-one dating relationships & start pursuing righteousness - uncover the peace and power that come from purity
Thursday, October 8, 2009
This Is Love
I've come to understand that God's Lordship in my life does not merely tinker with my approach to romance - it completely transforms it. God not only wants me to act differently; He wants me to think differently - to view love, purity and singleness from His perspective, to have a new lifestyle and a new attitude.
The basis of this new attitude is God's love for us. John explains the connection between God's love and the way we relate to others in 1 John 4:10-11:
10 In this is love, not that we loved God, but that He loved us and sent His Son to be the propitiation for our sins. 11 Beloved, if God so loved us, we also ought to love one another.
Do you see what John is saying? God's amazing love for us at the cross provides both the example and the power for us to love others. People whose sins have been forgiven through faith in Jesus' death on the cross can't live or love the same ever again. We've been set free from our old self-centred life. We used to be controlled by what felt good, but now, as new creations, we're to be controlled by God's love. In 2 Corinthians 5:14-15, Paul writes:
14 For the love of Christ compels us, because we judge thus: that if One died for all, then all died; 15 and He died for all, that those who live should live no longer for themselves, but for Him who died for them and rose again.
The Bible teaches us that if we truly trust in Jesus Christ, we die to our old way of living. And we can no longer live for ourselves - we now live for God and for the good of others.
Because of that, relationships with the opposite sex can no longer be about 'having a good time' or 'learning what I want in a relationship'. They're not about getting, but giving. Every relationship for a Christian is an opportunity to love another person like God has loved us. To lay down our desires and do what's in his/her best interest. To care for him/her even when there's nothing in it for us. To want that person's purity & holiness because it pleases God & protects him/her.
So whether or not we take a break from dating, if our dating is controlled by Christ's love it will look so radically different than the relationships around us that we'll want to come up with a different name for it!
The basis of this new attitude is God's love for us. John explains the connection between God's love and the way we relate to others in 1 John 4:10-11:
10 In this is love, not that we loved God, but that He loved us and sent His Son to be the propitiation for our sins. 11 Beloved, if God so loved us, we also ought to love one another.
Do you see what John is saying? God's amazing love for us at the cross provides both the example and the power for us to love others. People whose sins have been forgiven through faith in Jesus' death on the cross can't live or love the same ever again. We've been set free from our old self-centred life. We used to be controlled by what felt good, but now, as new creations, we're to be controlled by God's love. In 2 Corinthians 5:14-15, Paul writes:
14 For the love of Christ compels us, because we judge thus: that if One died for all, then all died; 15 and He died for all, that those who live should live no longer for themselves, but for Him who died for them and rose again.
The Bible teaches us that if we truly trust in Jesus Christ, we die to our old way of living. And we can no longer live for ourselves - we now live for God and for the good of others.
Because of that, relationships with the opposite sex can no longer be about 'having a good time' or 'learning what I want in a relationship'. They're not about getting, but giving. Every relationship for a Christian is an opportunity to love another person like God has loved us. To lay down our desires and do what's in his/her best interest. To care for him/her even when there's nothing in it for us. To want that person's purity & holiness because it pleases God & protects him/her.
So whether or not we take a break from dating, if our dating is controlled by Christ's love it will look so radically different than the relationships around us that we'll want to come up with a different name for it!
~ taken from "I Kissed Dating Goodbye" by Joshua Harris
Wednesday, October 7, 2009
So This Is Love?
It was finally here - Anna's wedding day, the day she had dreamed about and planned for moths. The small, picturesque church was crowded with friends & family.
Sunlight poured through the stained-glass windows, and the gentle music of a string quartet filled the air. Anna walked down the aisle toward David. Joy surged within her. This was the moment for which she has waited so long. He gently took her hand and they turned towards the altar.
but as the minister began to lead Anna & David through their vows, the unthinkable happened. A girl stood up in the middle of the congregation, walked quietly to the altar, and took David's other hand. Another gril approached and stood next to the first, followed by another. Soon, a chain of six girls stood by him as he repeated his vows to Anna.
Anna felt her lip begin to quiver as tears welled up in her eyes. "Is this some kind of joke?" she whispered to David.
"I'm.. I'm sorry, Anna," he said, staring at the floor.
"Who are these girls, David? What is going on?" she gasped.
"They're girls from my past," he answered sadly. "Anna, they don't mean anything to me now.. but I've given part of my heart to each of them."
"I thought your heart was mine," she said.
"It is, it is," he pleaded. "Everything that's left is yours."
A tear rolled down Anna's cheek. Then she woke up.
1. How many men/women could line up next to me on my wedding day?
2. How many times have I given my heart away in short-term relationships?
3. Will I have anything left to give my husband/wife?
Sunlight poured through the stained-glass windows, and the gentle music of a string quartet filled the air. Anna walked down the aisle toward David. Joy surged within her. This was the moment for which she has waited so long. He gently took her hand and they turned towards the altar.
but as the minister began to lead Anna & David through their vows, the unthinkable happened. A girl stood up in the middle of the congregation, walked quietly to the altar, and took David's other hand. Another gril approached and stood next to the first, followed by another. Soon, a chain of six girls stood by him as he repeated his vows to Anna.
Anna felt her lip begin to quiver as tears welled up in her eyes. "Is this some kind of joke?" she whispered to David.
"I'm.. I'm sorry, Anna," he said, staring at the floor.
"Who are these girls, David? What is going on?" she gasped.
"They're girls from my past," he answered sadly. "Anna, they don't mean anything to me now.. but I've given part of my heart to each of them."
"I thought your heart was mine," she said.
"It is, it is," he pleaded. "Everything that's left is yours."
A tear rolled down Anna's cheek. Then she woke up.
1. How many men/women could line up next to me on my wedding day?
2. How many times have I given my heart away in short-term relationships?
3. Will I have anything left to give my husband/wife?
~ taken from "I Kissed Dating Goodbye" by Joshua Harris
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